5 Ways to Reduce Pre Date Anxiety

There are certain things in life that are inevitable; a yearly Marvel movie release, McDonalds at the end of a night out and pre date anxiety. Of course, pre date anxiety is something that varies from person to person. If it doesn’t happen to you, yay you! You may stop reading now. However, if you are among the majority of human beings who do experience those pre date nerves, you can take solace in knowing you are not alone. And, there’s a way to fix them!

Active Date Ideas to Get Couples Moving

The traditional dinner and a movie date can be great, but it’s fun to switch-up date night occasionally. Why not try an active date instead? Whether a couple is heading out on their first date or they’ve been married for years, incorporating physical activity can spark healthy habits and new interests. Here are some fun and healthy date ideas to help couples stay active and mix things up a bit.

Does Drinking Help or Hinder First Date Conversation?

Ah the first date….

You arrive before him, staking your claim on a decent corner table, so you don’t have to awkwardly wait in line with your date; throwing away all your best conversation starters within the first 2 minutes of meeting him.

Practice Makes Perfect – First Date Etiquette

A right swipe has led you to another first date. Or maybe you met each other through friends or serendipity. However the plans were hatched, you need to be prepared. Yes, first dates are thrilling and adventurous, but they can also be the stuff of nightmares…or meme legends.

Don’t go into any first date without doing your homework. Plan ahead—and don’t forget an exit strategy! That’s right… just in case it isn’t working out. Then again, magic could happen. You really never know when (or why) sparks fly.

Regardless of how the night goes, there is one unfailing, cross-generational, simple rule: Remember your manners!

Your first date could be fantastic, horrible, blah or absolutely hilarious. No matter how crazy the date or how perfect the person, etiquette is still everything.  And some simple manners might just lead to another date (if you want one!):

Check-In

No, I’m not suggesting you let your date know every fine detail about your location before arrival. But if you’re running late, please shoot over a text or give them a ring. Also, if you’re at a concert or crowded venue, make sure you don’t lose each other.

Chivalry isn’t Dead…So Open the Door

Oh, the knight in shining armor…be still my heart! Or not. Life isn’t a fairy tale, and not every chica (or chico) wants to be rescued. Still, guys, it doesn’t hurt to be a gentleman.

A man who holds the door is charming. I’ll tell you, it kind of makes me blush a bit…but in a good way. A man who holds the door open is outwardly displaying that he’s looking out for you. The guy who lets it slam in someone’s face? Yeah. Not a good catch.

Woo with flowers…gentlemen

Bringing a bouquet of flowers will make a great impression. Although, bringing a dozen (or more!) roses might look a bit like you’re over-reaching. So opt for unique blooms. Try daffodils for spring. Sunflowers or bright Gerbera daisies are cheery and a cute pick for a first date flower bouquet.

Self-Care Goes a Long Way

And, please, please, please….remember to shower and groom. Not everyone finds that sweaty smell of testosterone sexy. And, ladies, not everyone loves your post-gym scent either. Body odor is not cool. Shower after the gym, please. And keep cologne and perfume use to a mild minimum! Your date will remember if you smelled like the first floor of Macy’s.

 

Be Real.

First dates aren’t necessarily the time to let everything loose. However, nothing is worse than faking who you are. To really understand if it’s a match, both sides need to give a little. This isn’t the point to let out deep dark truths, but it is the time to let your date know who you are and what you value.

Offer to Pay!

The dating world is equal when it comes to women and men. So, ladies, if you are a more traditional thinker, you might need to step out of your comfort zone. Meaning: always be prepared to split the tab. There are no firm guidelines here, and advice differs. Offer to pay half. If he (or she) objects, fine.

 

Stilettos? Opt for whatever is most comfortable! 

Wear comfortable shoes. Nothing orthopedic, but comfortable. Oh, ladies (or men, too!) super high heels can result in mishaps. And, let’s face it, some days are awkward enough without getting a heel jammed into a sidewalk crack.

Connect or Disconnect?

Bring your cell phone to a first date, as it can provide an easy out. However, don’t text friends, answer calls or check social media sites while on a date. Be considerate of your date and others around you. Snap selfies and pics if the two of you are hitting it off, though

How to Exit Gracefully…

Awkward date? Everyone has a horror story. To get out of a going nowhere meet-up, tell a friend to text you at a certain time to check in. Or take a trip to the bathroom to make a call or drop a text asking for help. Cosmo recommends faking an allergy or pretending to feel sick.

Always remember that first dates hold the potential for future love. This could be the beginning of something remarkable, something amazing. This date could be the beginning of forever. You just never know.

 

Not Stiff but Smart – First Date Style Guide for Men

First dates are always a touch stressful; an occasion where we meticulously think about what to wear. Choosing the right outfit is an easy bonus point on the ‘first impression’ score card, and today, I am going to focus on the male wardrobe.

Let’s take a look at two common mistakes men tend to make when choosing a date outfit. First, you may be under-dressed and second, you may be over-dressed for the occasion..

Here are some tricks and tips on what to wear on your first date. And you don’t even have to break the bank to look and feel good – online clothing sales are always a great go-to.

Grooming comes first

Before thinking about what clothes or style you should rock on your date, decide whether you need a shave, get a haircut, or trim the beard! Make sure you’ve brushed your teeth (+1 for flossing), you’ve trimmed your fingernails and have groomed that facial hair, that sometimes makes you look like a well-traveled backpacker.

Before you head out the door, spray a little of your favorite scent but don’t overuse it! The last thing you want to do is smell like the perfume aisle in a department store.

Dress appropriately for the occasion 

Comfort is everything but I’m not talking sweatpants and sweatshirt. No no. Dressing appropriately, while still being comfortable is key! Women are keen observers; they notice details and the last thing you want her to think is she’s the one making you uncomfortable, even though it’s 100% your tight pants. If you know you’re going to a trendy cocktail bar, start ironing that dress shirt, but if you’re off to a casual bar, jeans and a crisp T are completely acceptable.

Not stiff but smart 

Women love seeing men look sharp but not overly dressed up in that expensive tux. Tux or flashy suits make men look intelligent and classy, but wearing it on the first date may be a touch overwhelming, depending on where it is you’re going of course. Dressing smart but appropriate will go a long way.

Pick a shirt and a nice tailored blazer, and trouser — without the tie,  is perfect.

Let your shirt do the flirting

Listen up gentlemen, button down shirts are sexy. Women find it attractive when men tease them with some skin showing, not too much though!

Be creative and don’t be afraid to play around with textures, prints, and color. Be sure to find a good shirt that will emphasize the tone of your body; it should not be too tight or too loose.

Choosing the right shoes

Now to finish off the outfit with a perfect pair of kicks!

A pair of well-polished leather shoes goes well with you smart casual. Follow the proper dress code in the place where you’ll be having your date.

Expert tip ** Avoid wearing new leather shoes on your first date. It may add unattractive points if you start limping because you have a blister.

If you have it, flaunt it.

This doesn’t mean you should wear a singlet which is barely a shirt I may add, just to show off those muscles. Cover up but always emphasize your favorite physical traits to feel confident, which will inevitably capture your date’s attention.

7 Signs Your First Date is Going Great

If you’ve been online dating for any length of time, you know that first dates can be very hit or miss. Sometimes, you just don’t seem to hit it off at all. In these cases, you exchange an awkward hug at the end of the evening, and call it a night. Sometimes, however, you receive a call or text the next day asking to hang out again. Dumbfounded, you wonder if he or she was on the same date as you.

While we can all laugh about these awkward encounters, sometimes you simply hit it off with someone right away and your first date goes off without a hitch. During these times, however, you may be wondering, “am I the only one who feels this way?”

To avoid these misunderstandings, we wanted to look at tangible evidence that indicates a date is going well. We came up with this simple checklist you can use to analyze your outing; here are seven signs your first date is going great!

[ √ ] Genuine Face Time

I’m not talking about the FaceTime app on your iPhone, I mean face time as in eye contact, nodding, and smiling. If your date is too busy looking through his or her phone instead of at you, it’s a good sign they may not be interested. Pay attention to this, it’s definitely bad form to scroll through your phone and ignore your date.

On the other hand, you can tell if your date is really engaged in the conversation by his or her body language. Is he or she reacting to the conversation, leaning in, nodding, smiling or laughing?Smiling can also be a good indicator of mutual attraction.

[ √ ] The Conversation Flows, Easily

Are you and your date able to have a normal conversation, or are there a lot of awkward pauses? If you’re able to converse comfortably, it’s a good indication that you feel at ease around each other. It’s an even better sign if you’re able to crack jokes and share your sense of humor.

Of course, if the conversation doesn’t flow freely, don’t write your date off just yet. Remember, everyone can have first-date jitters, and it can be hard for some people to open up right away. You also don’t want your date to feel too much like an interview with pre-rehearsed questions.

If you’re enjoying yourself and having a normal conversation, rest assured things are going well. This is a good sign that you can at least communicate, and as you know, that’s a non-negotiable foundation piece for any successful relationship.

[ √ ] They Make You Laugh

Not every first date is going to be a comedy show, and it really shouldn’t be, but if you’re able to laugh with your date from the get go, you’re already ahead of the game. Plus, this means you’re probably pretty comfortable with him or her, which isn’t always the case when you meet someone new.

[ √ ] You Have Things in Common

While we all have heard “opposites attract,” it’s a lot easier to get to know someone when you have some common interests. Plus, this sparks ideas for future dates if you’re both into similar music or movies or enjoy the same types of activities.

[ √ ] You Get the Feeling They’re a Good Person

I once found myself on a date where the guy yelled at our waitress because his tacos were breaking. Newsflash, genius, hard-shell tacos crack when you bite into them. I knew right away I didn’t want to be on a date with someone who was that rude to other people.

First impressions are very important, and you can generally tell when someone has good intentions. Pay attention to the way your date talks to you, the wait staff, or anyone else you interact with. If they’re generally courteous to the people around you, they’re most likely a nice person, or at least on their best behavior for the date, as they should be.

[ √ ] No One Pulls the “Something-Suddenly-Came-Up” Move

We all know the classic get-out-jail-free or get-out-of-this-date-now lines; “I think I left my straightener on,” “my friend needs me to pick him up…”, etc. If your date suddenly bolts with a lame excuse, it’s a safe bet the evening is a wash. But if you met up for dinner and are going somewhere else for coffee or dessert or you’re still sitting and talking long after your plates have been cleared, it’s safe to say you’re both having a pretty good time.

Now, this doesn’t mean you want to have a marathon, all-night first date, but if no one is in a rush, go with the flow and enjoy getting to know your date.

[ √ ] The Long Kiss Goodnight

OK, don’t get too excited, some people don’t kiss on the first date, out of principle. When you part with your date, however, pay attention to if he or she leans in for a kiss or hug, or just awkwardly walks away. If there’s some sort of comfortable embrace, there may be a second date or at least an “I had a wonderful time” text.

Of course, if you don’t hug or kiss, don’t jump to the conclusion that all bets are off just yet. He or she just may need a little more time to get more comfortable with you.

Keep an eye out for these positive indications while you’re on your date. You generally know right away if you want to see the person again or not, but if you pay attention to the signs, you will have a better idea if your date is on the same page.

How can you tell your date is going well? Let us know in the comments below!

5 Ways To Make A Great First Impression

They say that you only get one chance to make a great first impression. Whilst that isn’t true for every date, it still is important to get the first meeting off to a good start. When the nerves (or the traffic) kicks in, we can be left feeling flawed from the beginning. The problem is most of the time we have already set a certain expectation on ourselves and the date, so we feel disappointed if something doesn’t go exactly the way it should. The trick is to remember that sometimes are reaction to the curve balls are what really helps us seal the deal. But here are 5 quick tips on how to make sure you get their attention and a chance for a second date:

1: Don’t be late

Easier said than done in some circumstances, however if you know you are someone who is either notoriously late or perhaps have a job that keeps you overtime, make sure you accommodate for this. Turning up on time, shows that you respect the person and their time right from the beginning. It also means you will not keep them awkwardly waiting or be stressing out. In general, it’s just common good manners, and courtesy never goes astray.

2: Don’t talk about yourself all the time

Even if you are excited and fabulous, make sure you don’t dominate the conversation. It might be tempting to feel like you have to talk about yourself if your date is shy or stuck for answers. Instead ask them questions about who they are. First dates should be about getting to know each other to see if you have common interests and are compatible.

3: Don’t talk about past relationships or overshare

It’s good to keep things surface level on a first encounter. Not only does this give you a bit of mystery and keep your date intrigued, but it also shows that you have self-control with your words, thoughts and feelings. Talking about your ex or oversharing private parts of your life just aren’t appropriate for a first date. Even if you date starts to lead you down that path of conversation, try to change it quickly to avoid any sort of overly emotional or baggage talk.

4: Stay away from your phones

Make it a rule not to look at your phone when you are with your date. It’s a hard habit to break when we are always constantly checking our emails and social media. Don’t leave your phone out on the table, put it away and give your date your full attention. It signifies respect for them and your time together. It also means less distractions.

5: Dress to impress

Go to the physical effort for your date. We are human after all and being physically attracted to someone is a normal thing to feel. Dress with confidence and dress to impress. This isn’t about relying on just your looks to win them over, but rather feeling good about yourself and showing them that you respect yourself and them enough to make more than a normal effort.

 

What Not To Wear On A Date!

BUT WHAT WILL I WEAR!?

Famous last words of anyone heading out the door before a date!

Dates are already stressful enough – Deciding where to go, what to say and inevitably, what to wear! Today I am here to help you, by explaining what you should NOT wear on a first date!

Image result for but what will i wear gif

 

Crocs – Exhibit A, says it all. This foot wear is far too casual and it looks like you’re about to trim the hedges or water the plants.

Exhibit A.

ross

Socks with Sandals – How this ever became a ‘thing,’ I will never know. Anything is better than this – if you’re wearing socks, simply pull them off and Velcro those bad boys up. Or, here’s a good one, keep the sandals in the closet and put on shoes. Problem solved. 

Exhibit B.

socks-and-sandals-3

Stained Anything – This look tells me you just ate a Sloppy Joe and used your shirt as a napkin. Stop double dipping into your dirty hamper and put on that crisp laundered outfit you remembered to wash the night before your date! But seriously – this rule should apply to your every day routine. 

Exhibit C.

sloppy-joe

Shants and Sheeves – For those of you new to these two terms, they may be my favorite words of all time. 

Shants are short-pants, but not any old short pant. Shants are pants that hang just a touch shorter than they should. They are pant’s awkward cousin. Exhibit D, is a person who needs to read this article and a perfect example of someone rocking socks with sandals and a good ol’ pair of shants. How to know when you’re wearing shants? Take a seat and if the pants linger above your calves, they are SHANTS.

Exhibit D.

socks-and-sandals

Now you may have guessed what Sheeves are based on the definition of Shants.

Sheeves (a word, I believe, I made up) are short-sleeves that fall in that no man’s land between your wrist and elbow. A sweater or shirt, that is clearly too small for you, will inevitably come with a pair of sheeves.  

Exhibit E.

sheeves-edited

Uncomfortable Heels – Okay, I always feel my best in a great pair of heels but let’s get serious. The last thing you want to do after saying goodbye to your date is trot away looking like Bambi. Comfortable heels do exist ladies! 

Exhibit F.

Image result for a girl who can't walk in heels gif

Too much cologne or perfume – THE WORST – Everyone knows a date that smells good, is a date to remember; but, when perfume or cologne is applied like lotion, it’s toxic!

Exhibit G.

perfume1

Gym Gear – Even though you look totally cute in your new gym ensemble, this outfit does not cut it on a first date! Arriving in your sports tank and shorts will immediately suggest you’ve come straight from your sweaty work out. Talk about a smelly first impression. This shows you didn’t take even a little bit of time or effort to look presentable. 

Exhibit H.

gym-gear

See Through Anything – Leave a little something up to the imagination! If you do plan on wearing anything sheer on a date, I suggest a solid tank or bando to go underneath. Save that super sexy number for a girls night out.

Exhibit I.

jenner

There you have it; my top 7 What Not To Wears on your first date. Now do yourself a favor and burn those crocs.

Anxiety Before A Date? Release It With These Tips!

Do you ever get that feeling that anxiety is everywhere? You’re not wrong; studies have shown that struggles with anxiety and depression have been steadily rising in the United States since the Great Depression. No one is exactly sure how this trend got started, or why it’s continued for over 80 years, but we have discovered many ways to help ease anxiety when it rears its ugly head.

Some people use aromatherapy, some meditate, and others spend time coloring. But today, we’re going to talk about a way to relieve anxiety and flood your brain with endorphins: exercise. Not only is exercise great for your physical and mental health, it can often be a great social activity – or even a great date. If you’re nervous about going out with someone you really like, then a nice, active date can be just the thing you need to release that stress and have a great time.

Explore Nature on A Hike

Walking in the woods is a great date activity for folks who love the great outdoors. It’s cheap (sometimes free), the scenery is great, and gives you and your date plenty of time to talk and get to know each other. It’s also great for relieving stress! In fact, a simple, 20-minute walk in the woods can lower stress hormones and anxiety levels. So take a little time to enjoy the fresh air and beauty of nature. You and your date will be at ease and having fun before you know it!

go-on-hike

Go For A Run

I know, running doesn’t seem very sexy. You’re sweaty and breathing hard, your heart is pounding… well, actually, nevermind. The point is that running is a great way to relieve anxiety (runner’s high is real, you know), and the health benefits of a good old fashioned jog are out of this world. See if your date is interested in taking in a run and catching coffee or a smoothie afterward. You’ll both feel happier after.

go-run

Get Some Peace of Mind with Yoga

Yoga has been lauded as a great exercise for ebbing the flow of anxiety and stress. Along with stretching and strengthening the muscles, yoga focuses on deep breathing, which can help settle the mind. So if you’re waiting for your date and your mind is going a mile a minute, take a beat and relax with a few gentle yoga poses. You won’t believe how much calmer you feel!

Also, if you’re really feeling adventurous, and you’re comfortable with your date (probably not a first-date idea), you could take a class together or try out some two-person poses. Who knows – things might heat up.

yogs

Reconnect With Your Inner Child

Do you ever remember being stressed out as a kid (I hope not)? No, those were the happy, carefree days, when everything was fun and easy. So why not take your date back to those good old days? Try playing a fun game you loved as a kid, like capture the flag or freeze tag, and soon enough you’ll both be loosened up and full of endorphins. Or if you’re looking for something more gravity defying, get on a trampoline and see if you can still do backflips like you used to!

tramp

The next time you’re feeling anxious, sad, or overwhelmed by everyday life, don’t worry – just get on your workout clothes and try some of these exercises. Trust us, it will be nearly impossible to not have fun.

Healthy Tips Before Your Date

Well, it’s happened: you’ve met someone you have a really good connection with, and you’ve agreed to meet up for your first official date. So what do you do in the meantime? Your stomach is a veritable butterfly box. You’re anxious, but excited – and above all, full of energy.

Why not channel that energy into something healthy? After all, the right lifestyle changes won’t just improve your health, they could even help improve your date! Here are a few tips that will keep you healthy as you prepare for your big date:

Sweat It Out

Ideally, you already have a regular workout routine, but if you don’t there’s no time like the present! Exercising for at least 30 minutes in the days leading up to your date will help release stress, fill your body with endorphins (which, as we all know, make you happy), and give you that little boost of confidence you need. Of course, this doesn’t mean you need to get a gym membership or start running marathons to exercise. A walk in the park or an afternoon with a hula hoop can be enough to reap some incredible benefits.

Stay Hydrated

After all that exercise, of course you’ll want to head to the fridge for a refreshing glass of cold water. But water shouldn’t just be an after-workout drink. You should be sipping on it all day long! Drinking enough water can improve how you feel, how your skin looks, even your temperament (just ask this guy, who found that drinking more water made him more energetic and more handsome). And more water isn’t the only way to improve your health; cutting back on diuretics like caffeine and alcohol in the week prior to your date is one way to ensure that you are alert, energized, and in a good mood.

Get Some Shut Eye

Think about how you want to come across on this date. Do you want to seem witty? Engaging? Cool? Well then you had better get some sleep! Many researchers, including the folks at Harvard Medical School, have found a clear link between your mood and how much sleep you’ve had (to which the parent of every toddler said a loud, resounding, “duh”). If you want to be your best self on your big date, it’s important you’ve had adequate sleep the night before. So plan ahead, and make sure that you’re ready and rested.

Pamper Yourself

Of course, when the big day comes, you’ll be a bundle of nervous energy. No sweat! That’s totally normal. However, if your nerves are so great that they become a distraction, it might be time to do something about it. Go out and do something that relaxes you. Take a walk, get a manicure, sit in the steam room at your gym – whatever makes you feel relaxed and wonderful. That little bit of self care will help put you in a great mood, so that when your date comes you are ready for a fantastic night.

What other ways do you get ready for a big date? Tell us in the comments below!