What To Do When Your Online Conversation Comes To A Halt

So, you finally find someone online with an exciting profile. You’ve messaged them a friendly “hello” and they’ve responded. Nice!

Well, not so much. You message them back and the only thing you get in return is the sound of crickets chirping. What’s a smart, sexy single to do?

First and foremost, take a deep breath and remember that this person isn’t yet a part of your ‘everyday’  life. So if this online pen pal doesn’t lead to a relationship, it’s not a big deal. There are plenty of other people available online.

Second, if you really think there may be a connection and you suspect that your potential special someone may be wondering what to write back to you, then there is something you can do: send a follow up message with a question that expands the conversation and makes it easy for them to engage with you.

Let me give you an example.

Perhaps in your initial message you gave a friendly hello and asked a light and breezy question about something in their profile — like, “You went camping in the Grand Canyon? I love it there! What were your favorite hiking trails?” They respond to your question, to which you say, “I LOVE that trail, it is so beautiful!” And then… silence (chirp, chirp!).

At this point, you could either wait for their response, which you may never get, or you can message them again and ask another light and breezy question: “Where else have you hiked?”

The beauty of online dating is that people usually list their favorite topics in their profiles. So if the Grand Canyon conversation is a dud, you can refer back to their profile and ask another question about something else they’re passionate about. Perhaps they’re also addicted to “Game of Thrones.” Hopefully your additional message will re-engage them. If everything goes really well, you’ll soon talk on the phone, meet in person and perhaps go on from there to an amazing relationship.

But if you send that additional message and they don’t respond, just move on. There’s no shortage of singles online and there’s no need to exert too much energy on someone who isn’t giving you the energy and attention you deserve in return.

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Online dating can be a lot of fun if you choose to invest your time only on the people who are available and quickly forget the ones who aren’t.

I hope you find what you’re looking for online and please let me know how you’re doing on my facebook or twitterFor more dating tips please check out my book, “Flirt For Fun & Meet THE ONE,” and cheers to your dating success!

The 3 Best Questions to Ask Your Online Date

The entire point of online dating is so you can meet someone online with the intention of meeting “offline” or in real life. Unless you want to remain a virtual dater, I always suggest you create a successful strategy to online dating that will help you to go on more first dates and increase your chances of meeting someone you’ll connect with. A great way to know if someone is worth meeting, is to have a set of what I call K.Y.D’s “Know Your Date” questions.

Here are the 3 best questions to ask your potential online date and why they are important.

What are your current relationship goals?

It’s a good idea to know right off the bat whether you and your potential online date share the same relationship goals. This is one of the first things you want to clarify outside of whether or not they are single. Some people who are dating online are there for various reasons and at different stages in their dating life. You could be dating online because you’re bored in your current relationship, you recently broke up with someone and now want to play the field or you could be at a point in your life where you are ready to find Mr.Right, have babies and settle down within the next year! Asking someone what their relationship goals are seems pretty common sense to me.

 

What are five things you can’t live without?

I love this question because you get great insight about what’s really important to the person you’re dating. He may say his mom, his iPhone6, his boys night of poker, his Jack Daniels, his German Sheppard, Sunday night football or his X-box addiction. The answers are limitless and what you get is an opportunity to imagine what life may be like to live with the things he can’t live without. Are you really interested in competing with his season tickets during his favourite sports season, or dealing with his heavy metal music play list before he goes to bed every night? I am not suggesting that all the items in his list will be terrible or incompatible, however there may be some deal breakers and red flags for you to take note of.

 

What are your deal breakers or turn-offs in a relationship?

This question is really a gift to you. Knowing his automatic turn’off’s is a key factor to determine compatibility. A great way to see if he’s ruled you out of his dating pool if anything he mentions is a deal breaker you possess. There’s no point in pretending that you don’t smoke if he says that smoking is deal breaker or going to church on Sundays when that’s where you know you’ll be on the weekend. What if the guy you’re interested in says that he hates women who wear a lot of make up. You happen to be a make up artist, have the largest make up collection ever and wouldn’t be caught dead without your lipstick and bronzing powder before leaving the house? Clearly this is something you don’t have in common.

There you have my suggested best 3 online dating questions to determine whether the guy you like is worth meeting offline and going on a first date.

5 TMI’s To Avoid In Your Dating Profile

Your online dating profile is an effective way for you to market yourself to other great singles such as yourself! Think of it this way, you are the product and you need to sell that product to your target audience. Who is your target audience? Potential partners you are trying to attract! You do this by being a quality product of course, but you also do it by promoting that product the right way. This is why you need to have a great profile picture, a catchy tag line and a stellar profile!

 
One thing that makes a profile more interesting is leaving something to the imagination. Many times people write all the wrong information in their profile and it does not paint them in the best light. A big mistake I see all too often is people putting too much information which ends up scaring potential dates away. In order to market yourself better when online dating, here are my 5 TMI’s to avoid in your dating profile.

5 TMI’s To Avoid In Your Dating Profile

1. Personal Identifiers
Someone shouldn’t be able to identify where you live, work or any personal contact information from your profile. This includes taking pictures in front of your house or workplace. Remember safety first because stranger danger is real! Don’t be paranoid but don’t put yourself at risk either.

 

2. Previous Relationships
We’ve all had failed relationships, some of them ended in not so pleasant ways. There is no need to go into excruciating details about your previous relationships and why they ended and how much your ex did you wrong. When you do that you show that you’re still not over them or the situation which will scare people off.

 
3. Health Issues
While any major life threatening or debilitating illnesses should be discussed, you don’t need to talk about minor health issues or bodily functions (no one needs to know what happens when you eat chili). If you do need to discuss a health issue, you don’t need to be very specific about it, leave details to when you get to know each other more.

 

4. Sexual History
You don’t need to discuss your “number” or how many notches you have on your belt. You should avoid discussing your fetishes or your sexual activity preferences as well. If you associate yourself with a particular lifestyle that is important to you, then make sure to state it but don’t get into too much detail.

 

5. Baggage
Everyone has baggage, but if you have unresolved issues you have to be careful about how it affects the way you date. Your online dating profile is not the place for it. You don’t need to discuss how you don’t speak to your family or how you were severely mistreated as a child or how nobody loves you. It won’t serve you well.

 

When creating your online dating profile, make sure it reflects who you are while still showing your best self to prospective partners. Avoiding TMI in your dating profile will help you show that you are a quality partner who is worthy of a second glance. By marketing yourself better online you will not only attract more people, you will be able to take it to the next level and, ultimately, find your happily ever after!

Single? Make Online Dating Your #1 Resolution!

Make 2016 your year! It is time to break out of your comfort zone and open yourself up to the world of online dating!

Here are 7 reasons why you should make online dating your #1 New Year’s resolution!

 

  • Date outside your friend group – Break the habit of dating a friend or someone in your social circle. I think we default to this because we are scared and find comfort in knowing a little something about a person prior to dating them. Also, it doesn’t help that all your friends are telling you to go for him/her when in your heart of hearts it feels like a forced relationship. Try something a little different this time and explore the prospect of finding someone online. Many of you will say “but I’m not desperate yet…” Making an online profile does not determine you are desperate, it proves you are open to a world of possibilities! I guarantee you will meet people you would have never met otherwise!
  • Bigger pool to pick from – Online dating provides a much bigger pool to choose from, when selecting a potential partner. At PlentyOfFish we see a whopping 4 million people logging onto their profile daily. With numbers like this, I am surprised when single people tell me they aren’t actively online dating!
  • Peak season – This is the best time to shine! Historically, right after Christmas until after Valentine’s Day, PlentyOfFish experiences a permanent increase in signups of over 20%! If you have ever wondered whether you should try out online dating, right now is the ideal time for you to take the plunge and test the waters.
  • It’s genuinely fun – You have the power to make your online experience what you want it to be. One of the best ways to approach this ample world of opportunity is to have an open mind and a positive outlook! Checking out profiles from afar can be really fun, without the pressure that you would typically endure in a traditional setting like a bar or party. Crack a bottle of wine, slip into your pjs and start scrolling!
  • Save money – Online dating is not only extremely convenient, but it is rather inexpensive as well! You can create a profile on PlentyOfFish for free and immediately start talking to singles. Going out with friends to check out the opposite sex can be really fun, but doing this on a weekly basis will make a significant dent in your bank account.
  • Practice – As they say, practice makes perfect! If you are newly single or in an extended dry spell, online dating is a great place to start. You have the opportunity to really chat with someone before you decide to meet them or not. Taking baby steps will help you find your stride again.
  • Accessibility – The start of the new year tends to be a little chaotic as you’re attempting to nail down your routine for the months to come. By the time you get home from work, you realize you haven’t had a solid conversation with anyone because you were glued to your monitors all day. Well you don’t have your busy schedule as an excuse anymore, because dating has evolved! Mobile apps make the world of dating much easier for those on the go! Sign into PlentyOfFish and set up a date while on your way to Starbucks in the morning or on the treadmill after work! dbf34e1f49f74deb1193b743029c2594

 

 

Online Daters Are About To Break The Internet

Fueled by the weight of new resolutions and prying family questions around the dinner table, singles will flock to online dating sites on Sunday, January 3rd 2016.

Just as we’ve come to accept other seasonal traditions as inevitable, PlentyOfFish can now predict the exact time every year (down to the hour in fact), when single people everywhere collectively decide they’ve had enough – this year will be the year for them to find love.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, the date doesn’t fluctuate much every year. The holidays have a way of constantly reminding single people of their relationship status with an unrelenting stream of love-based messaging. First you notice every other commercial seems to be for De Beers, then the mistletoe shows up at the Christmas parties, and when enough people have asked you about your New Year’s Eve kiss come January 1st… your online dating profile is basically halfway filled out.

It’s the perfect holiday cocktail for love (perhaps with a dash of exasperation), and it comes to a head on January 3rd, specifically at 3pm PST, the moment you’re quickly coming down from the last spiked eggnog of the season. Signups to PlentyOfFish will jump by a whopping 24% over 24 hours.

And it’s not just a one-day affair, either. The winter days are short and cold, social lives usually aren’t at an all-time high, and even solo Netflix marathons start to seem less fulfilling – so the signups continue. Historically, peak period in online dating starts the day after Christmas, and runs straight through after Valentine’s day, resulting in a permanent increase in signups of over 20%.

Further, these impressive numbers are set to pay off for hopeful singles. More signups mean more traffic, resulting in more conversations being started and eventually more matches being made. Users who sign up in the first week of January find their partner an average of two weeks faster than those who sign up later, an average of 10 weeks compared to an average of 12 weeks throughout the rest of the year.

So there you have it, time is on your side when it comes to online dating this winter. And with over 2 million singles predicted to sign up to PlentyOfFish in January alone, you’ll be in good company.