According to Data: Small Talk is a BIG Thing

“The weather is great today….Do you like…the weather?”

Small talk has had a bad rep for as long as I can remember. It’s often considered irrelevant, surface level conversation, used to pass the time and/or fill the air of an awkward silence. Examples of small talk include; ‘how’s it going?’, ‘where do you work?’ ‘nice day isn’t it?’ – questions that are often met with a one word answer.

The beauty of engaging in small talk, which we often miss, is the possibility of it leading to a meaningful conversation or new connection, you would have otherwise missed.

According to data, small talk is actually a BIG thing.

74 percent of single Americans said small talk is worthwhile – 45 percent of singles said because it helps break the ice, and 31 percent because it helps get basic information about someone.

Engaging in small talk is much easier said than done, but all it takes, is a little practice.

Oftentimes, when I hop into the elevator on my way up to work, I’ll glance over at the person next to me, looking for an opportunity to connect with them. Unfortunately, they have their head down looking at their phone. I know for a fact, they don’t even have cell reception, (because we are in the elevator) and instead of having a face-to-face conversation with a real person, they’d rather keep staring down at their home screen.

Why do we do this? Perhaps we’re totally unaware we’re doing it, too shy to engage, or are more stimulated by our bright screens.

My immediate assumption is this person doesn’t want to be bothered, so I get off at my floor and carry on with my day. Opportunity missed.

I’ve most certainly been guilty of the above, and most likely you have as well. We are all missing opportunities to learn from and connect with people on a daily basis.

Even though someone has their head down in their phone, remember a whopping 74 percent of Americans DO want to engage in small talk. Perhaps you’re stuck on what to say to a stranger, or maybe you are in fact waiting for an important text to come through, either way, make an effort to be present with the person directly in front of you, even if it’s just ‘hello’.

Here are some tips to get you started on how to chit-chat:

  • Take off your headphones and enjoy the scenery when you transit to and from work. This way you are open to a possible interaction with someone next to you on the train home. If you can’t do this every day, try it once or twice a week to start.
  • Reference something about the person – people enjoy talking about themselves, so give them a reason to! Perhaps they have a book in their hand – “Oh I just finished that book, are you liking it so far?” 
  • Ask simple questions – For example, “Coming home from work? How was your day today? 

If you’re not met with the most enthusiastic of answers; know that you’ve tried and that it’s okay to move on. It’s important to read your audience. If the response is extremely positive, you can follow up with another question or continue on a tangent. Hopefully you find yourself in an engaging conversation that has left you feeling energized, excited or inspired!

*Data from Plenty of Fish Conversation Nation Study.

Data Reveals: Top Words To Use in Your Messages that Lead to Conversations

How many times have you caught yourself staring blankly at a cute dating profile, not having the slightest clue how to craft a first message to catch their attention?

I for one, just put up my hand – Guilty as charged.

Luckily for me and you; Plenty of Fish recently analyzed hundreds of thousands of conversations to pull a list of the top words singles use in their first messages that actually lead to a conversation.

The Plenty of Fish findings reveal that compliments go a long way not only IRL but online too!

Men looking to strike up a conversation with the next lady you swipe right on, send a first message that contains a sincere compliment. Plenty of Fish found a full 20 % of guys who use the word “beautiful” got into conversations with ladies online. Or try your hand at using the words, “gorgeous” and “pretty”, which were also among the top 5 words that lead to conversations.

Hot Tip For Men – Top Words that Lead to Conversations Online

  1. Beautiful
  2. Love
  3. Nice
  4. Gorgeous
  5. Pretty
  6. Sexy
  7. Today
  8. Great
  9. Smile
  10. Interested

Now for the ladies – It looks like men like to be complimented just as much as we do! Women who talked about how “handsome” a guy is, or made reference to his “smile” were highly likely to engage in conversation with men online.

Hot Tip For Women – Top Words that Lead to Conversations Online

  1. Nice
  2. Love
  3. Handsome
  4. Great
  5. Smile
  6. Beautiful
  7. Cute
  8. Interested
  9. Chat
  10. Meet

Summer is red hot and conversations are heating up online! Try using these top words in your own messages to spark a conversation. Good luck and get out there!

Hook Ups, Crashers and Boozers – What Really Goes Down At Weddings

Wedding season is in full swing and you have 5 + pending invites to your family member’s, friend’s and co-worker’s weddings, but you’re not entirely sure you want to sit through another huge reminder that you are still single.

Always a bridesmaid, never a bride. Am I right or am I right! Hold back those tears for another day, because Plenty of Fish has great news for all you single wedding attendees!

In a survey of over 3000 Plenty of Fish users from the U.S. (ages 21-65), 44 percent of singles identified weddings as a great place to hook up! The reason being, (51.8 percent) said because it’s so easy to start a conversation at a wedding.

Not sure how to approach that attractive groomsmen/bridesmaid? Try these easy ice breakers:

‘Hey, I’m Kate – friends of the bride! How do you know the lovely couple?’ 

‘I’m so sorry I forgot your name but I know I’ve met you before through [insert grooms/bridsmaid name]!’ 

‘How funny was that speech by [insert name], it had me cry-laughing. I don’t think we’ve met yet, I’m Kate!’ 

If you’re looking for more than just a one night hook up, it looks like you may be in luck! Plenty of Fish also found that 16 percent of singles that met someone at a wedding, actually went on to have a relationship with the person they met.

Ladies, don’t be afraid to make the first move; apparently 40.7 percent of male survey respondents said they were propositioned by a woman first!

The drinks are flowing, love is in the air, we can’t think of a better spot for singles to mingle!

If you’re wondering what else to expect at your next wedding? Take a look at what else singles reported experiencing while celebrating a union:

  • 44 percent have sat through a cringe-worthy speech
  • 41 percent have had too much to drink
  • 20 percent have hooked up with someone in the wedding party
  • 10 percent have crashed a wedding

There you have it, solid proof that you should strike up conversation with that wedding guest who caught your eye! You never know where it may lead!

May the Fourth Be With You #StarWarsDay

Single Star Wars


fans unite!



The latest data from Plenty of Fish reveals some very promising news regarding the love life of single Star Wars fans! 

Plenty of Fish analyzed 13 million profiles of Plenty of Fish users in the United States, and found that users who list “Star Wars” as an interest on their profile are 61 % more likely to leave the site in a relationship than non-fans. That’s right, love strikes back for Star Wars fans far and wide. 

But where do you meet fellow Star Wars fans just like yourself? Don’t worry, Plenty of Fish  has the answer. Research shows the list below are the top 10 cities where Star Wars lovers can find each other, and talk droids, compare light sabers and discuss Episode 8 theories. 

  1. Los Angeles
  2. San Antonio
  3. San Diego
  4. Las Vegas
  5. Orlando
  6. Houston
  7. Phoenix
  8. Jacksonville
  9. Colorado Springs
  10. Chicago

Star Wars fans are also 26% more likely to be looking for a serious relationship than non-fans. If you were ever shy about your level of fandom, now is your time to shine and use it as a conversation starter on your next date.

May the fourth be with you! 

Here’s a Tip – Don’t Talk Politics On Your Date

Saturday marks President Trump’s first 100 days in office, and there is sure to be some extra discussion around politics. Whether the debate be between family or friends, Plenty of Fish suggests all singles avoid political conversations altogether on their next date!

Plenty of Fish surveyed nearly 7,000 men and women in the United States to look into the current state of dating and politics.

Here’s what we found:

Don’t talk politics – That’s right, 43 % of singles believe politics should be discussed ONLY when someone else brings it up, and another  27 % of respondents believe politics should never be brought up on a date period. So when you’re running through your ‘conversation starters’, before meeting  your crush, we suggests crossing politics off the list and, saving it for a later date.

Who want’s a beer with Obama?  When we asked singles, ‘what American political figure they’d like to have a beer and conversation with,’ Obama won the popular vote and beat out President Trump. When asked why?, comments were overwhelmingly favorable for Obama compared to Trump.

31 % – Barack Obama 

22 % Donald Trump 

20 % George W. Bush 

11 % Bernie Sanders

6 % Hillary Clinton 

5 % Joe Biden 

5 % Mike Pence 

Trump Love? Male | Female divide Last year – pre-election, Plenty of Fish found 1/3 of single women were willing to date a Trump supporter, versus 55 % of women this year and another 26 % undecided. While women still remain divided on our president, 75 % of men said they would date a President Trump supporter with only 10 % refusing.

When we asked if respondents would date someone with drastically different political views, more than half (53%) would but, once broken down by gender, we saw a divide yet again with 62 % of men saying they would date outside their political comfort zone, but only 39 % of women said they would.

Make up or break up? Apparently the answer was ‘break up’ for 300 survey respondents, when asked if they had broken up with someone over political party affiliation. YIKES.

Would you or have you ever broken up with a SO over political differences?!