Love, that ethereal four-letter word. A word that can invoke lust, dreaminess, and frustration. Most certainly never boring and oftentimes all consuming. We seek it when sometimes we shouldn’t, miss it when it’s gone, and embrace it when we find it.
It’s time to get on board with the use of emojis in conversations, if you aren’t already. They’ve officially taken the dating world by storm! And, as we know too well, with great power comes great responsibility. A beneficial tool when used well, a simple emoji can easily help or hinder your chances with someone you are chatting to.
If your new year’s resolution is to find love, then listen up!
This Sunday, January 7, 2018, is predicted to be the busiest day of the year for online dating, according to Plenty of Fish data. The best time for users to log into their POF app and start chatting with other singles is at 9pm. Signups are expected to reach 117,139, which means plenty of potential matches at your fingertips!
You’ve just finished up your holiday parties with family and friends and have the rest of the week booked off work. Not sure what to do with all your extra time? Get a head start on your New Year’s resolutions with this list of holiday DO’s!
Between the mistletoe, sappy TV adverts, and Mariah Carey songs, it’s easy to fall under the Christmas romance spell.
Side effects of the Christmas romance spell include: wondering if Dave from the Accounts Departments is actually your one true love, or spending a lot of time at the ice rink waiting to fall into the arms of Prince/Princess charming!
**Spoiler alert: Dave probably isn’t your soul mate, but even if he is, tequila-drunk at the Christmas party isn’t the best time to explore this option.
Photos in online dating profiles offer a glimpse into who people are, what they are passionate about, how they spend their time and how they like to present themselves to the world.
Unfortunately, many people use less than flattering photos in their online dating profile and they may not even know they’re doing it! Much like a resume, an online dating profile should be polished, well thought-out, succinct and tell a story about oneself. These are some of the most common mistakes I’ve seen people make with their online dating photos:
In the age of online dating, a photo says a thousand words and evidently enables singles to quickly and efficiently review a huge pool of potential mates.
Photos can uncover so much about a person beyond just the looks department. Photos tell a story, reveal hobbies, interests, pets and give an inside glimpse into what a person is all about. Before diving into the waters of online dating, I have a few tips that I think will help you select those winning pictures for your very own profile.
Adventure: Take photos while you’re out and about on an adventure (road-trips, funky joints, colorful backdrops). If you’re travelling with friends, give them your phone to capture candid moments to avoid a million selfies.
Hobbies: Use photos illustrating hobbies and passions: if you surf, play soccer, enjoy painting, be sure to include a photo of you enjoying what it is you love to do every week.
Variety: Show a variety of looks in your photos: a profile with the same expression over and over won’t give anyone the chance to see more than one side of you. Try to add as much variety into your images as possible – one dressed up for an event, the everyday look, and the outdoorsy look (if that’s your thing). Also, provide a mix of photos that show your whole body and facial features.
Fun: Smile, laugh and be silly – the key here is to show you don’t take yourself too seriously.
Photographer: Hire a photographer, one that specializes in online dating or candid photos, not portraits or modeling photos.
Photoshop: I highly advise against photoshopping your photos (skin softening, blemish removal, eye size correction or slimming effects). Usually, it’s quite obvious when a photo has been manipulated which can quickly turn off your potential match; because, at the end of the day, they want to see the real you.
Landscape: Including photos in your profile without you in them (i.e. a view, landscape, just your dog) is a big no no and such a waste of a photo. If you want to include these in your photos, that’s great, but make sure you’re in them.
The Same Old: Repetitive photos that either reveal only one side of your face or only top part of your body.
Head shots: Modeling photos, portraits, Linkedin head shots, boudoir and glamour photos may be a little overboard for your dating profile. Save the boudoir for when you’re in a relationship!
Snapchat Filters: Photos of you being a bunny, a dog, a kitten etc, are highly filtered and aren’t necessarily as cute as you may think. These photos are fun to share within the snapchat app so its best to just keep them there.
Group shots: I’m thrilled you have friends, but it’s going to take me awhile to figure out who you are in the photo. Photos that are not labeled or ones where identity cannot be determined easily, aren’t getting you anywhere.
The Old Photo: Photos that are over 5 + years old and portray a radically different look than your current appearance are not an accurate representation of yourself. If your hair is now red but in your profile it’s black, you may want to update your picture.
Don’t have the money or cannot find an online dating photographer? No problem! There are plenty of solutions and alternatives. Take photos while out with friends, ask strangers to take photos of you while traveling or out at a scenic or interesting location.
Candid photos reveal the most attractive qualities in everyone – the ability to be silly and make fun of yourself is endearing. In an age where everyone is overly focused on creating the perfect ubiquitous profile, letting your guard down, and showing your quirks can go a long way.
Are you attempting to strike up a conversation with someone on PlentyOfFish right now? Writing that very first message is exciting, nerve racking and straight up difficult sometimes. You try to be witty, insightful and original in your messaging to stand out among all the other messages in her/his inbox.
Picture this: you’ve spent the night out with your girls, getting turnt at the hottest club in town. As you file out into the street, walking gingerly in your heels, you blow kisses goodbye and hop into a cab… just as someone else climbs in through the other door! It’s awkward for a moment, but you agree to share the ride, and tell stories of your epic night along the way. By the time the ride is over, you’ve swapped phone numbers (maybe even a kiss), and the world is aglow with the potential of a new romance…
Sounds exhausting, right?
If you’re an introvert, a meet-cute like this is just not for you. In fact, you’d probably rather find someone online, sharing long, soul-spilling emails with potential partners like Meg Ryan in You’ve Got Mail. And guess what? That’s okay! In fact, it’s practically the norm: it is believed that one-third of modern marriages got their start on the Web. Online dating is a phenomenon, and for many introverts who are tired (or afraid) of the traditional dating scene, the Internet can be the perfect solution.
But with so many people looking for love online, how will you know who’s right for you? For all it’s good qualities, the Internet can feel scary. But by following just a few tips, you’ll be able to suss out your soulmate from the World Wide Web.
Get Personal With Your Profile
With online dating, even more so than in the world, you have to “put yourself out there.” In a real-world setting, prospective partners can learn about you from your body language, facial expressions, and behavior; here, there is only your profile. So make sure the profile screams “you!”
And we mean the REAL you. Everyone likes “spending time with friends,” “watching the sunset,” and “cuddling by the fire.” Be specific about your interests, and don’t hold anything back. Are you an avid hiker who spends your mornings meditating on mountaintops? Write it down. Do you spend your Saturdays writing fan-fiction about the best friend adventures of Gandalf, Magneto, and Dumbledore? Put it in the profile. Do you breed madagascar hissing roaches? Let the world know!
According to Christie Hartman, Ph.D., many people stick to the basics when building their online profile. They are afraid of “sounding too different or too odd, not realizing that it actually backfires.” But the people you’re looking to connect with are the people who share your interests (or at least think they are interesting). So let your true colors show!
Check For Personality Clues
You want the people you meet online to share your interests. But you also want to make they have what you’re looking for. Pay attention to clues in their profile that reveal the man (or woman) behind the screen.
Do you want a fellow introvert you can cuddle with quietly? Look for someone whose interests line up with the quiet life – reading, movies, etc. Do you want an extrovert to bring you into his active social life? Look for a profile filled with pictures from parties. These little clues will point you towards the person you want to be with!
Try A Specific Site
Remember all those interests we talked about before? The things that make you the unique and amazing person you are? Well, for those of us searching for some who truly understands our likes and dislikes, niche dating sites exist! Whether you are a cat lover or a Dr. Who fanatic, there is a site for you! Many introverts have tremendous passion when it comes to their hobbies, so sites like these can be a good way to meet someone with whom you’ll feel a connection. And besides, even if you don’t find a soulmate, you might end up with a whole bunch of new friends!
Go On A Date!
Yes, yes, this one may seem obvious, but it’s important! After all the time you spent building a profile, searching for matches, and getting past the (horribly awkward) initial small talk via text and email, you deserve a date. Get out of your comfort zone, get face-to-face with your online match, and have fun! Who knows, maybe you’ll be in the lucky one-third of folks who found their soulmate on the screen.