Don’t Make These Dating Mistakes

No one wants to know that they are at fault for why their relationships are falling apart. I mean sure we aren’t perfect, but are we purposely self -sabotaging our love life? If you are constantly finding yourself single and disappointed, then perhaps it’s time to look at what you may be doing wrong.

Here are 8 mistakes you could be making in your dating life:

1: You are choosing the wrong people to date

Chances are if you keep finding yourself in the same situation, then you must be dating the same type of person over and over again. Sure, we all have a type, but make sure that ‘type’ is also someone who values and treats you well. It’s one thing to be attracted to certain physical traits, but it’s altogether another thing to not look beyond their appearance and take into account their character. If you can identify where you are going wrong, then try and choose consciously to date someone that is going to be better for you.

2: You are giving off mixed signals

They don’t know whether you’re coming or going, and this is probably because you don’t know either! Make sure that you are whole and happy before you start your search for love. Have a clear idea of what you want in a partner and how much you are willing to invest. Playing games or being hot and cold, will only bring confusion, frustration to both people involved.  You don’t have to play games to win at love, so be open honest and transparent.

3: You have unrealistic expectations

We all want the fairy tale, but it doesn’t always look how we can imagine it to in our heads. When you go on a date make sure you are enjoying and staying present in the moment, instead of ticking off boxes in your head. Have a good idea about what you want and need in a relationship but remember to be flexible and realistic.

4: You keep settling for second best

This is because you haven’t learnt just how much you are worth. When we successfully love ourselves in a healthy way, we are then able to set the bar for how we let others love us. Don’t date out of loneliness, fear or desperation, make sure you are happy and complete before you put yourself out there. Know where boundaries need to be placed, and the difference between compromising and settling.

5: You get too serious and attached too fast

We live in a fast-paced instant society that wants everything yesterday! Take your time to get to know someone’s character and intentions before you let them into your heart. Good old fashioned courting means that you can get to see just how serious your date is about wanting you in their life.

6: You keep bringing up the past

Talking about your past relationships or hurts is not going to help your present or future love life. This isn’t about denying what has happened but rather choosing the right time in a relationship of when to talk about it. As a rule, you should never discuss ex’s in detail on a first date. Make sure you have fully healed and let go of your last heartache before you embark on a new relationship.

7: You’re trying too hard

Whilst it’s great to be active in finding love, there also needs to be a point where you can be overdoing it. No matter how bad you want to find the right one, make sure you are choosing quality over quantity. Serial dating only leads to frustration and confusion. Try not to overwhelm yourself, by taking time in between dates and not dating just for the sake of it. If you are on the hunt, your suitors will sense it and probably run for the hills. Make sure you are at peace within yourself and also able to enjoy your time alone.

8: You’re not trying hard enough

And then on the other hand you may not be active enough. Love isn’t going to turn up on our doorstep, we need to create opportunities to invite it into our life. This might be as simple as setting up a dating profile, or expanding your social circle. More than likely you will have to get out of your comfort zone. Remember the golden rule, dating is only as complicated as we allow it to be.

Most Common Online Dating Mistakes

The world as we know it has changed drastically, and now more than ever, people are resorting to the Internet to shop, read and even date. Now sure there are plenty of ways to meet a guy or gal, but the fact of the matter is, we can’t ignore the growing demand of the online dating world.

To help those brave individuals who are looking for love in digital places, I’ve complied a list of 10 common online dating mistakes to help you avoid them.

Posting a bad profile picture

If you’re trying to attract a guy, ATTRACT him! Ultimately, you want your profile picture to portray you in a nutshell. Not too boring, not too sexy, and a great big smile. Just give enough to make him wonder.

You’ve made yourself too available

Men like to play the cat and mouse game. It’s fun and it’s exciting. Make him work for the date, make him work for your time. Remember, YOU are the prize. Don’t be too easy!

Too occupied with work/life to date

Don’t be a “Temp” online dater. If you’re looking for love, make the time to engage and get to know possible candidates. If you don’t have the time to date, you won’t have the time for a relationship. Enough said.

Not open to meeting face-to-face

If you’ve signed up for an online dating service, the goal is to actually meet people. Don’t ruin the fun for possible suitors with your anxiety. Get in the game!

You invited him over to your house

Not only is this a safety issue, but it’s also not a great first impression. It’s way too much, way too soon. A first date should be someplace public and inexpensive (i.e. A coffee shop).

Sleeping with him right away

If you find a guy you like, take your time and get to know him first and foremost. If he’s worthy, he will pursue you and do everything in his power to stay relevant. If you give it up right away, you’ll be right back on the dating site where you started.

Non-responsive to messages

If a guy is showing interest in you, get back to him. There are other fish in the sea. If you’re not around to get caught, he’ll find another.

Being too aggressive

Creating a profile on an online dating site already makes it clear that you’re interested and available. The bone has already been thrown. If you have to chase the guy, you’re doing it wrong.

Posting profile info nobody cares about

The average guy doesn’t like to read if he doesn’t have to. Keep your profile simple and to the point. Talk about things that are relevant (i.e. Age, location, family, hobbies, etc). This isn’t LinkedIn. Keep the info here personal and down to earth.

Talking about what you don’t want

Don’t be a pessimist. Keep your profile positive, upbeat and uplifting and the guys will come.