It’s a natural instinct to try and protect ourselves from being hurt. Let’s face it, finding love puts us in a vulnerable position. When we put our heart on the line there is always a chance that it could get broken or rejected. It’s this fear that then causes us to start to heighten our defenses and play games to try and stay in control.

However, when there are games involved, it means there will always be a loser. It doesn’t matter whether you are female or male, playing games is never going to bring you long- term happiness. In fact, it’s going to block the right person from feeling like they are welcome in your life.

So here are a few tips on why it’s time to just stick to chess and give love a real chance:

1: Shutting people off will leave you lonely

When we start to toy with people’s emotions, it will automatically make them shut off. They will start to withdraw for fear of being hurt or rejected and in the end, you won’t be left with anyone. Love takes vulnerability and that means risking a certain part of your mind and heart in order to let someone in. Game playing will only discourage the right people from wanting to get close to you.

2: Playing games ruins trust

Here’s the thing, you need to be consistent and transparent when you start dating someone, as this is what builds trust. If you are acting like a yoyo with your emotions or sending mixed signals then your dates won’t know where they stand with you. How can you expect someone to open up and have confidence in you if you are constantly breadcrumbing?

3: Being a player attracts the wrong type of people

It will only be a matter of time before the player gets played. If you put out a certain behaviour, then you will attract a similar one back. If you want to have a healthy, strong and loving relationship then you need to decide how you want to be perceived and how you are going to act.

4: Playing games is counterproductive and a time waster

If you are on a mission to break as many hearts as you can, just so you don’t get yours broken, then you need to stop and think long and hard. By fooling around and being dishonest to yourself and the people you hurt, you are not only wasting their time, but you are wasting yours as well. Eventually all of this will catch up to you and you will be left wondering if it was all worth it in the end. So save yourself the time and heartache and allow yourself to let people in. Love isn’t always easy but it’s definitely worth it.