Low self-esteem and inadequacy – we don’t like to talk about them, especially in regards to dating, but they’re natural feelings, and we definitely have all felt them.
Dating is not always a walk in the park. As much as we’d like it to be as easy as going on only one date to find our happily ever after, this is unfortunately not always the case. Finding your person often takes some serious effort and a whole lot of trial and error, and when things don’t go our way it can leave us feeling less than stellar.
When the dates just aren’t going your way, and the feelings of inadequacy start creeping in, here are the top two tips to overcome them.
Take an Intentional Break From Dating
If you just got out of a sub-par relationship, or feel like you’ve been going on date after date with no luck, one of the best things you can do for yourself is take an intentional break from dating.
We surveyed 2,000 singles in the United States, and 62% said that yes, they take intentional breaks from dating.
Why do this, you ask?
Simple. If your dating life is causing a hit to your self-esteem, it’s time you take a break to focus on the areas of your life that make you happy.
The majority (52%) of singles who said they take breaks from dating do it, so they can focus on family, friends, career etc
When you spend time and energy on the people and things in your life that already matter, you’ll be rewarded with both love and care from family and friends, and a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction from the extra effort put into your work. You may even want to spend some of your date-free time taking up a new hobby, or rediscovering an old one.
The point is, dating should make you feel good. If it doesn’t, it’s time for a break!
Dedicate Time to Self-Care
Self-care is always important; but when you’re feeling down in the dumps after a few bad dates, it’s even more important to spend time taking care of yourself.
The majority of singles (59%) report their self-esteem is either average, low, or very low
As humans, we often struggle daily with feeling good about ourselves. In order to like what we see on the outside, we have to like what we see on the inside first, and a focus on self-care is the best way to do this.
Self-care can look different for everyone and can be any number of things as long as it’s following one guiding principle: it makes you feel GOOD.
If you’re stuck on where to start, here are some good options:
- Spend time with family and friends (20% of singles say this has worked for them to overcome feelings of inadequacy)
- Journaling/meditation
- Spend time alone (18% of singles choose solitude which can be a great way to clear the mind)
- Exercise (14% of singles say this has worked for them to overcome feelings of inadequacy)
- Cleaning/tidying
- Grooming (taking a bath, painting your nails etc.)
- Focus on hobbies or things you’re good at (21% of singles say this has worked for them to overcome feelings of inadequacy)
- Cooking
- Talk to a therapist/counselor (3% of singles say this has worked for them to overcome feelings of inadequacy)
These suggestions will get you started, but the trick is to find your own routine that helps you feel like the best version of yourself.
Bad dates and bad relationships are no fun, and everyone deserves to feel happy and confident. If you’re struggling with feelings of inadequacy in your dating life, hopefully, some time spent focusing on the above tips will soon have you feeling good as new and ready to try again.
