When you meet someone you’re excited about, it’s easy to get swept up in the romance and promises of something great as everything unfolds in front of you at lightning speed, but how do you know when to pump the brakes? The truth is, when you rush a relationship you can derail it faster than you can swipe left, so here are 5 signs you’re moving too fast in a relationship:
You’re isolated
Noticing your social life is dwindling in a major way? You used to have a well-rounded life filled with your own passions, your friends and family, your work, your cat, but now it seems that your relationship is sucking up all of your time and energy. Great relationships require balance, so if you’ve suddenly pushed aside things that matter to you in favor of a brand new romance, it’s time to reevaluate. Call your mother.
You’re rebounding
When a long term relationship ends, it’s normal to miss the intimacy that comes with having a significant other. Sometimes, we jump into new relationships right away, even if it isn’t quite the right fit. If you’ve gotten out of a serious relationship less than 6 months ago and are finding yourself on the fast track to another…it’s possible you’re moving too fast. Spend some time alone, take a trip, or learn about something you’ve always been interested in. Set up more of a schedule for yourself and consider scaling back a bit on time with your new guy.
There’s shade from friends
Last week when you were out for brunch with your girlfriends and announced your intention to move in with your guy after 3 months, did you catch a couple of sideways glances? Maybe they’re coming right out with it and telling you to ease off (in which case you don’t need this list), but most often our loved ones don’t want to intrude on our happiness or insult our judgement. The moral of the story is if your friends are dropping hints, it may be time to listen to the people who know you best, and want the best for you.
It’s TMI too soon
If he’s asking you to meet his parents while simultaneously sharing his online banking details and booking your first vacation, and you’re only on week 3, that new Coldplay song he just dedicated to you on the radio (do people still do this?) should sound like ALARM BELLS. It’s important to integrate your significant other into your life, but this is a gradual process, and when it happens all at once it can be incredibly overwhelming. Also, the mystery around not knowing every. single. thing. about your partner is something to be cherished. If the relationship is meant to be, you will most likely end up sharing a bathroom with them, yearning for the early days when you didn’t know everything about each other.
A gut feeling
When you know, you know. Even if 99% of the time things are feeling good with the speed of this new relationship, that 1% deserves some recognition. Sit down with your partner and let them know how you’re feeling.
