There’s no shortage of online dating advice from women for women out there, but ever wondered what the guys have to say? We found one to break down some of the biggest turnoffs on online dating profiles for us.
We all know that great images are crucial to attract the right people, but after a few minutes of browsing profiles, it’s obvious that most people don’t know what constitutes a great photograph. It’s easy to get lost in a sea of selfies. When it comes to choosing your main profile image (which goes front and centre) it pays to get a second opinion. Or even better – get a professional or a photographer friend to take a few good pics for you. This might seem like a lot of effort, but considering you’re looking for a life partner, doesn’t it make sense to invest a little more effort than just choosing a couple random pics on your iPhone? At the very least, make sure you’re not in a bathroom or standing in front of a dirty mirror in a messy room.
The importance of strong images should not be overlooked! below I have listed more turnoffs when it comes to images on online dating profiles:
- Your images feature your more attractive friend: This has been demonstrated in psychological studies; if you place something which is better side by side with something which is less appealing, the less appealing ‘thing’ will become much less appealing because of the rule of comparison (look in book for term). That may seem harsh, but I might ask for your friend’s number instead.
- Your image is taken at the club with 6 other people: Just like an image with a more attractive friend, a pic with a lot of other people in it can be distracting and will take attention away from the star of the show; it equates to visual noise. Crop away!
- Your images are blurry or distant: Does this really need to be explained? Men browsing your profile want to see what you actually look like, so don’t use pics where you are not visible for any reason. These days, it’s pretty likely that even the camera on your phone can take amazing photos, so put it to good use!
- Your images are old or inaccurate images: It’s dishonest to use photos that don’t represent you accurately. We’re all changing with the years; sometimes we gain weight, sometimes we lose it, and we all gain a few wrinkles over time. If you only have old photos then seriously consider getting a few fresh pics which accurately represent what you look like now.
When it comes to writing about yourself on your profile, remember that most guys have a short attention span and are not going to read your life story. Short, concise and readable will help ensure that the right guy for you will actually read what you’ve written and absorb the info. But more on that below.
Here are the most common pitfalls to avoid when creating your profile:
- You’re using insecure opening lines: An insecure opening line can make a less than ideal impression on everyone who reads it. A common one is, “I don’t know how to write this” or “I’m really bad at talking about myself.” These types of opening lines are not helping you find anyone, and I’m already bored. Start strong and never demean yourself and your abilities in your writing. Guys don’t want to know that you hate writing about yourself, they want to learn about that cool course you took, or that you love camping in the mountains.
- You’re writing novels: Nobody wants to read a profile that rivals a Harry Potter book. Think of your profile as a lengthy Facebook update and just write 2-3 paragraphs. It’s refreshing to see a concise profile which doesn’t contain a lot of unnecessary information (but also covers who you are, stuff you like to do, and what you’re looking for).
- You’re writing lies: I’ve gone on dates only to be extremely disappointed because there was some sort of misrepresentation of the facts presented. Many woman have also told me their stories of disappointment having been lied to by the men they were meeting. A great relationship starts with honesty – just be yourself!
- You’re writing angry or bitter stuff: I’ve seen some profiles with very attractive photos but ended up being extremely turned off by the rants that followed underneath. If you rant on your profile or talk about all of the things you don’t like or want you’re not going to attract the kind of guy you do want. Focus on the positive things you do like and leave the baggage behind.
What are your biggest turnoffs on online dating profiles? Let me know in the comments below!