There are certain things in life that are inevitable; a yearly Marvel movie release, McDonalds at the end of a night out and pre date anxiety. Of course, pre date anxiety is something that varies from person to person. If it doesn’t happen to you, yay you! You may stop reading now. However, if you are among the majority of human beings who do experience those pre date nerves, you can take solace in knowing you are not alone. And, there’s a way to fix them!
Dress to Impress… Yourself
You know what feels really good? Looking really good. Get past how superficial that sounds and stick with me. I’m not talking Academy Awards ready, I just mean wearing what makes you feel most like yourself. This is coming from a woman who feels her best in an oversized tee, ripped Levis cutoffs and a pair of Vans. Granted, this is not something I would likely wear on a date – but you get the point. Don’t dress the way you – or society – think you should be dressing on a date. Plan to wear something that you not only look good in, but feel good in too. Dressing for yourself immediately alleviates the uneasiness of pre date jitters. If you can’t walk in the shoes, are they even worth it? Hot tip: it helps to choose what you are going to wear the night before or the morning of the date. That way there is no rush when it comes to getting ready.
Self Care, Baby!
It seems like the term “self care” has popped up out of nowhere and is already the new, hip buzzword. The only difference is, it actually works. Did you know that as mammals we spend most of our lives dedicating a significant percentage of our brain power to nurturing other mammals? In fluctuating degrees, it starts to take a toll on our bodies both mentally and physically. The least you can do to give yourself a step up on your anxiety is to take care of your basic needs. Prior to your date, get some fresh air, take a bath, get a full night’s sleep. It is well worth it.
Straighten Up, Literally.
The body is a weird and wonderful thing. So weird and so wonderful in fact, that you can trick it into doing, being and feeling. Before embarking on your date, make a mental note to straighten your posture and raise your chin. A straightened posture is actually able to convince your mind into confidence. And, two words: Power. Pose. Do you think Wonder Woman mopes around her apartment when she’s feeling nervous? Well, she might. But I bet she also follows these tips. Stand with your legs shoulder length apart and your arms stretched out above your head in a V shape and just breath. I can’t explain the magic at play here, but it is a surefire combination to cure any temporary tension.
Move Your Body
Or alternatively titled “Endorphins Are Your Best Friend”. Elle Woods, of Legally Blonde fame, taught the world a lot about self worth. One gem of wisdom came in the form of a rebuttal; “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy.” She wasn’t wrong. Endorphins are a chemical that is released when your body is being challenged, used to reduce your perception of pain. By getting exercise – or my preferred method, dancing around my apartment to Stevie Wonder records – your brain enters fight mode, which is where endorphins come in. Your general mood improves just with the increase of activity. Science rules!
Pre Game Pep Talk
Never undervalue a good pep talk. Ever notice how we are generally able to give motivational talks to our friends, but somehow forget our own advice when it comes to dealing with our emotions? Rather than focus on faults, lift yourself up by highlighting why you’re awesome. When I’m feeling nervous or inferior I like to initially remember that, like everyone else, I’m human. We all have that in common. Afterwards, I can add on to that; I’m human, and what else? What makes me great? List at least 3 positive attributes about yourself, to yourself. Attitude is psychological first, change the way you’re thinking about yourself and it’ll inevitably change your behaviour. Also, talking to a friend or family member to boost confidence is something super helpful to ease nerves. Finally, while it might seem obvious, mapping out your route to the actual date to avoid being late is beneficial; leave any flustered feelings at home!